The many needs of man...

TEACHER: Tommy, why do you always get so dirty? TOMMY: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

TEACHER: Willie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. WILLIE: Me!

TEACHER: Cindy, why are you doing your math multiplication On the floor? CINDY: You told me to do it without using tables!

TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him? JOHNNY: Because George still had the ax in his hand.

TEACHER: 'Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?' JOHNNY: 'Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time.'